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the second try

Tonight i deleted some posts here and now i wanna try to blog a second time here. but maybe i get a second posterous and write there. Let’s try.

see ya, gr4y

disturbing person

The sister of my grandpa has been here since last wednesday and told me how i should live. She thinks her advises should help me, but they were really annoying. I want to live my life and i don’t need the advices from a person like her. She didn’t respect other persons, if the has a problem with somebody they talk to other persons, not to the person they have problems with.  I hate this behaviour. She has no sense how you deal with other persons.

She criticized every little detail here. But now were free again, she is away. Back to her little place 500km (about 310 miles) from here.

I hope my english is good enough, that you understand my post! ;-)

yours, gr4y

everything fine

It seems like i am depressive, right? But i’m okay, i swear! I write in moments when i think about me and my situation. I am able to shut off these thoughts and everything is fine for me.

endless loop

Since 7PM (now it’s 9PM) my thoughts stuck in a very bad mood. I search for a new job but most of the offers require some higher education than mine. I want to work with php and the other web-techniques not these java-crap.

I don’t have the money to study. I don’t have the money to do my own thing. And i don’t have the money to move to another town. Endless loop!

But i should look forward. Sometimes i should get happy. The question is: When?

emotional

Today i woke up at 7.00 AM and i felt sad. Very sad. I was disatisfied with me and my life. Whats the sense of life? This i asked myself, but i had no answer. I’m usually not so emotional, so I decided to write an article on my mobile phone. At 8.30 i got up and decided to keep the article as draft on my phone and go to work.

At work my boss explained me the requirement again and then i know what i meant on my notices. I used this light moment to write it down. It’s so simple now, i have to understand it! :-)

This week was confusing for me. But now: WEEKEND!

By the way: You are able now to comment on my posts! I used InstantDebate.com for the comments. I liked it because its get acquired from Automattic, the creators of the best blogging-tool ever: WordPress.

yours, gr4y

alive

Gosh… This was a day. I got a little idea what i should do, but in fact this part of our system was written some years ago. Maybe the developer shouted out: Yay! I can’t believe… It’s running. Don’t ask me how i get it running and please DON’T touch it anymore!!!

My Feeling was something between happy, tired, sad and confused. Very annoying!

yours, gr4y

confused

I’m sitting in the office in front of Eclipse, looking at the code i wrote last thursday and ask myself one good question: What should i do today? I know my boss gave me a new project last thursday.

Something with a searcher. I understand his requirement. I have written some notices on a piece of paper. But today i am to confused to understand my own notices. What could this mean: “one prefix” or “parameter out of request”? O.o

Well… Let’s do something. At 3.30PM i can get outta here. :-)

yours, gr4y